The Education of children
A variety of parenting techniques, parents can apply depending on the characteristics, behaviour and age of the child. To apply and to choose the methods of parents depends on their level of psychological and pedagogical knowledge, and how they themselves were brought up, etc.
The choice of methods of education of children affected by the behavior of parents, who may be ambivalent, authoritarian and democratic.
These methods form not only a Mature person, complete harmony, they sometimes become the cause of various psychological complexes.
The main methods used in the education of children.
Method of persuasion and conversation. This method is used in the education of children with any character and at different ages. In conversation with children, parents argue and explain how to properly maintain in a variety of situations, figuring out the motivations of the child. The tone of the conversation parents have to be firm and confident calm. Even kids at the age of one year, not knowing how else to respond, carefully listen to their parents, responding to their intonation.
Method of positive reinforcement. Reinforcements are some parental actions that follow his deeds and actions. Reinforcement is positive (positive) and negative. Positive reinforcement we include gratitude, praise, positive parental actions (to give a new toy, turn on cartoons, to give a piece of candy) and negative (negative) reinforcement– punishment, strict observations.
Method of positive reinforcement is also in expression of positive emotions to the child that caused his actions. When the kid does something good and necessary, it needs to Express its appreciation to him and always praise, it can be a hug, a kiss, a smile, a pleasant word, such as ” you’re young, smart, doing the right thing, etc.” or other actions that cause the baby positive emotions and pleasant sensations.
The method of negative reinforcement is based on the statement of the child’s negative attitude to his actions. It can be comments (“Good children don’t do that, this act bad), reproach (” you upset us, you did a bad thing”), as well as punishment.
The penalties are different. One of the methods of effective punishment is time-out is when the child for some time, leave one, not communicating with him and forbidding him to do anything. In families applying such a punishment, there is usually a special place where the baby for a while leave, it may be the angle, stool, chair. The child, getting to this place, realizes that he has done bad deeds and punished for it.
For bad behavior punishment can serve as a penalty, in the form of a ban of watching movies or cartoon, reducing the time of games, etc., as a penalty you cannot use these steps, your child can perform with pleasure. For example, to force him to write or read, wash dishes or clean the bathroom. This can cause the baby will begin to perceive such actions as a very unpleasant and in the future will be to avoid the execution of such orders. In the form of a fine can be sweet or deprivation of any of the Goodies (but not eating).
Method, the so-called training. It may sound a little rude, but it is a method of positive and negative reinforcement. The basis of this method consists in the following:
for bad behavior – negative (negative) reinforcement;
for good behavior – positive reinforcement.
These methods are sometimes referred to as “method of punishments and rewards” or using the carrot and the stick”. The main principles of these methods are identical, but there are a number of differences, for example, under the method of training, means of positive reinforcement, and method of awards mean award. For example, if a child washed the dishes, then it is a backup, and your promise about going with him at the weekend in the Park-it is a reward.
The method of “1-2-3”. This method of education is effective only when it is required to immediately cease the negative behavior of the child. This method is as follows: if the parent comments about the wrong behavior of the child and counting to three, the child does not respond and continues its bad behavior, it should be followed by punishment. This method is applicable to children older than two years. Starting to count to three while you do intervals of a few seconds (4-5 seconds). between numbers, the parents give the child a chance to think again and get out of this situation of impunity by changing their behaviour. In that case, if the child to the comments of the parent does not respond, continuing to misbehave after the accounts “3”, you need the punishment to enforce.
Using this method, the parent must not lose confidence and keep calm, the voice should be confident, and the account is clear. Otherwise, if the child will understand that an adult already “on edge”, in the hope to achieve our goal, may continue their bad actions.
Method “gramophone record”. Often in response to demands from parents, they get a lot of objections and excuses from the baby and begin to engage him in debate. In this case, they only lose time and can’t achieve his goal. For example: “Dasha have to go to kindergarten, get dressed”, “I don’t want in the garden”, I have to go to work, and you in the garden”, “I want to stay with you at home,” “I can’t stay at home I need a job”, etc. Explaining to the child is not quite clear things up for him, mothers usually start to go out of balance and just wasting their time. These conversations can go on forever. But should the mother stop repeat their demands and enter into the explanation of how the baby will immediately start to perform everything you need. “Dasha need to dress up and go to kindergarten”, “I do Not want to kindergarten”, “Dasha, you need to dress up and go”, “I want to stay with you at home”, “Dasha get dressed, we go to the garden”. The child seeing that to continue further conversation is useless, and that mom on about not going, he silently getting dressed.
In the process of education the majority of parents use the so-called method of physical action (hitting, slapping, beating, etc.). Still the answer is unequivocal about the effectiveness of this method was not found. For anybody not a secret that until recently, Lasher was used not only as punishment of children, but also adults. To date, this method of physical punishment by psychologists is considered as one of the most inefficient methods, in addition to younger person – traumatic. But, if you are a supporter of this impact, try this method to apply the most extraordinary extreme cases. First, you need to try to influence the child in a humane manner and to establish psychological contact.