The education of the child screaming
“Stop bitching!” “I forbid you!” “You watch it!?” “Don’t insult me!” and many more exclamations addressed to the child, often proceed from our lips. Why are we yelling at your child when he is naughty, or from their lyubopytno learns, and goes wherever he is banned?
What are the reasons that we’re yelling at your crumbs, sometimes even spanking?
So let’s speculate over the cause of our cry to the child. Well — the first and main reason in us adults — we don’t know how to control it.
Here are a few reasons for this child’s education:
*Education cries because us the same method was raised.
*Parent thinks that he is raising a child, and this method shows a main, thus thinking they have the right, at any nurturing.
*Mom or dad, just not ready to face difficulties. Not ready for that child, despite the mood mom or dad may require attention, or to explore the world as he wants.
*Another reason is, the fatigue and the ability to adequately respond to the demands or whims of the child.
*The parent has his or her own concerns, interests, which are apparently more important than the child.
In General, for many reasons, can be listed as an individual case, as a psychological barrier.
Cry on whims or disobedience of the child, this is not a method of education. By this method we show our weakness, and inability to adequately respond. We must remember that the child cannot properly verbalize what he wants, especially when he’s just learning to speak.
Even if the child is at this age that can speak and understands everything perfectly, but we parents are the example for the children, the child knows what the reaction of the parent .
How parents reacted to the child’s behavior, the same way it would react, and will do what he is asked. Children are naturally curious and interested in everything they try on — to know this world. We all know how the baby gets acquainted with a new subject – he takes it and tastes it “to the tooth”, takes, takes, takes what he forbid that he might be dangerous.
When the child makes a remark, “do not go there” well, the child is curious, he climbed on a stool and fell. What is the first reaction from your mom? Fear that the child, when she sees nothing, then from the mouths of moms are the words “I told you that fall! He is guilty, so you should be, in the future will know!” enough that the child has pain after the fall, in addition, he receives no comfort at all a “psychological blow” from her mother, in some cases, I’ll kick his butt for disobedience – it is a huge mistake.
Once again, children are curious, and there’s so much they do not understand, and what will be. Well not listen to the child, he has already learned a lesson, but do not lash out, screaming, and cleanem. You need the kid to calm, to put before the fact — here’s a chair, here you are, I told you that would happen if you climb up on a chair. Just explaining to the child, showing what were the consequences and how he’s hurt, so he in the future will listen to and trust their parents.
If a child is naughty, too demanding, if he has bad behavior – this suggests that the child initially incorrectly communicated, educated, he is deprived of parental attention.
Always, in any case, Creek — this is not a method of education. The cry addressed to the child is distancing yourself from your own flesh and blood. In the family, where we assume a screaming child in the future, the child will be withdrawn from the parents, he will not share with them their experiences, problems with classmates. Children raised shouts, grow difficult teenagers .
If parents want to be with their child in the communication on “you”, if you want to keep the child entrusted to their parents, parents themselves need to learn to control yourself. To control your emotions in front of the child, to work on themselves. Learn to speak with the child, understand the child, to explain to him the children are very attentive, and receptive.
The child in the parents must see friend, the one person he can trust, ask for advice, and know that at any moment it will support.
Sow an act and reap a habit, sow a habit and reap a character, sow a character and you reap destiny.