family

School for adoptive parents

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Is it possible to teach love and patience for 30 hours, found out the correspondent “RG” School for foster parents today are created in the country for more than three years working in the Samara region, 80 percent of foster children in the Samara region, crossing the threshold of adulthood, continue to reside in which they have become family homes. Taking the family to the child, one should not expect immediate appreciation.

Psychologist Samara city centre “Family” Elena Tonkobaeva says that the establishment of such schools was that collected together the questions which are often asked in the consultation adoptive parents, who already has children. Among the main problems were: lying, stealing, sloppiness, learning difficulties due to mental retardation, conflicts with the native child.

After analyzing the picture, I realized that most foster parents do not have enough knowledge of the basics of developmental psychology. To this decided to add and practical skills required in family education.

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What to do if your child is constantly lying?

Children – flowers of life. But if you do not care about their education, it can lead to very dire consequences. And special attention should be paid to lie. And why, in General, children lie? And what to do in this case?

Why are they doing it?

Why the child is lying? The reasons may be different:

Fantasy. Small children love to dream, and often don’t see the borders between reality and the fictional world. So the kid may not know that he is lying, as he will believe in their lies. But, as a rule, 5-6 years, these boundaries become more clear and meaningful, so the child begins to realize that not telling the truth.

Fear. If kid did something wrong, then he probably knows what this could entail punishment. And to avoid it, the child will hide the truth.

Lying may be a way to attract the attention of parents. Yes, if mom and dad do not pay child attention or paying too little time, he can lie. And the child knows what will be punished, but the punishment is already a manifestation of attention from parents.

Protest against restrictions and the way to avoid them. Yes, about 7-8 years child begins to understand that some bans parents much in the way to enjoy life. And, realizing this, the child begins to find ways of bypassing the restrictions and realize that mom and dad don’t Continue reading

The Love of parents is the program

Parents and children

Our instinctive love of children (ethologists would say — parental care) we are not alone in the animal world. In many species, parents attached to their children. Often, it is only to his own. Gull, great mom, biting and can even kill the alien chick, wandered on her colognebuy territory. And to wander long in the colony, all nests nearby. There are people (and quite a lot of them, usually they just hide it) who also love their children. But in most people there is another love — the love of children in General. Other people’s children. And this, from the point of view of the instinctive programs, not one and the same. When it originated and what was? This is a very interesting story, and it leads us to the emergence of man. Our closest relatives — the great apes — the way of life of its collectors, and as our direct ancestors. They don’t live in herds, and a very small kinship groups. And it is clear: major collector to anything big, hard-organized herd. Everyone gathers for himself, and not a lot of food will collect, collect if around others. You have many instinctive programs corresponding to this lifestyle: territorialism with his desire not to let outsiders into their territory, the instinct Continue reading

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