Parents and children
Our instinctive love of children (ethologists would say — parental care) we are not alone in the animal world. In many species, parents attached to their children. Often, it is only to his own. Gull, great mom, biting and can even kill the alien chick, wandered on her colognebuy territory. And to wander long in the colony, all nests nearby. There are people (and quite a lot of them, usually they just hide it) who also love their children. But in most people there is another love — the love of children in General. Other people’s children. And this, from the point of view of the instinctive programs, not one and the same. When it originated and what was? This is a very interesting story, and it leads us to the emergence of man. Our closest relatives — the great apes — the way of life of its collectors, and as our direct ancestors. They don’t live in herds, and a very small kinship groups. And it is clear: major collector to anything big, hard-organized herd. Everyone gathers for himself, and not a lot of food will collect, collect if around others. You have many instinctive programs corresponding to this lifestyle: territorialism with his desire not to let outsiders into their territory, the instinct Continue reading
Very important for parents is knowing the rules of application of methods of education, which A. S. Makarenko called “tool touch of personality”.
All methods of education scientists psychophysiological basis, or the mechanism that operates at the subconscious level. Ignoring it may lead to unpredictable results, so parents need to visualize how they applied the method may have an impact on the consciousness and behavior of the child.
The most common methods of raising children are a positive example, story, conversation, debate, teach, exercise, encouragement and punishment.
In Soviet pedagogy was considered to be the most effective methods of persuasion — a story, a conversation, a debate, otherwise known as verbal. Trusting such a scientific recommendations parents naively believed that after same notations naughty child will certainly improve.
The children perceived tedious instructions how soul-destroying occupation, and the outer reaction “of the object of education” did not reflect internal relationships. The child may exhibit ostentatious attention, but, according to psychologists, if he looks over the top of the head of an adult, he is busy with his own thoughts, imaginations; if downward, the soul vehemently argues, rejects the arguments of the parents, as if staring straight into the eyes and even nods, then Continue reading
Child theft is the so-called “shameful” problems. For any parent this is usually a shock: the child in the family because no one teaches them to steal, and he takes someone else’s…
This child’s behavior is perceived by the family as evidence of his incurable immorality. “We have no one in the family never did!” — I often hear from those affected relatives. Not only that, the child shames the family, the parents of his future is solely criminal. Though actually, in most cases, it’s not all bad.
The idea of what is “mine” and “theirs”, appears after three years, when he begins to develop a sense of self. Nobody in their right mind would call a thief two-three-year-old, who took without asking anyone’s thing. But the older the child, the more likely that his act would be regarded as an attempt to misappropriate, in other words — as “theft”.
The age of the child in such situation is conclusive evidence of awareness of the committed, although it is not always true. (There are known cases, when children are seven or eight years didn’t realize that by adopting someone’s thing, they violate the generally accepted norms, but sometimes, I have five children, committing theft, well aware that doing bad).
For example, could be considered a thief five year old boy who, feeling great sympathy to his peers, Continue reading